Thursday, October 8, 2009

Priorities in Perspective and Goals

Goodness this is a tough week for me. Jamie says it is pretty tough for him as well. Not really sure why. It's been almost three weeks since we brought Jesse home and nothing has changed. Each of the kids is behaving wonderfully. Sure, Jack is teething--cutting molars and eye teeth:-), and is a bit cranky and a typical tantrum throwing 18 month old:-), but usually super sweet. All three of them really love their new brother and show no signs of jealousy. Jesse is a very laid back, sweet baby. He is eating, sleeping and growing so well. We couldn't ask for more.

I have no postpartum or even baby blues either. Heavenly Father has blessed our family with so much. So why do I feel so overwhelmed and so snappy? It is bothering me. I don't want to feel this way. I don't want to seem ungrateful for all that I have been, and am being given because that is not the case at all.

I cannot express in words how truly grateful I am for each of my beautiful, sweet children. I also can't tell you how thankful I am for my husband--who is best friend, and an amazing father to our children! I love my family with all my heart and want to do all that I can each day to show them. I don't want to waste precious moments being snappy, impatient or forgetting what is truly important.

I am thankful to spend each day with my family, my children--teaching them and loving them. I have been told recently, especially in the last few weeks, that I should consider school for them again to lighten my load. No, sorry, this will not happen. No one loves or knows my children more than I do, besides Heavenly Father. I want to be their teacher. I love it, I enjoy it and I truly feel that my prayers have been heard and answered to help me be creative and inspired to teach them these last 6 months, and I know that this is what is best for our family.

This week, and tonight especially, I have spent time reading and reflecting. Reminding myself of what matters most, what doesn't, and where my priorities need to be. My goal for this month is simple--love my children and my husband unconditionally, and show them this outwardly, and try harder to find joy in each moment of each day. I don't want to take anything for granted. No regrets.

What matters most to me is pretty simple, here it is in pictures:


  1. Beautifully written. You have a beautiful family. It seems like your priorities are exactly where they should be, and that you know exactly which path to follow.

  2. wonderful sweet post! love the pictures!

    hope things get easier for you guys real soon

    if you ever need to talk i'm always here for you


  3. Wow- I feel that way a lot!!!!!! I can totally relate to what you said about being really thankful for the kids and yet snapping at them. For me, I think it is getting bogged down with the mundane- with the many things you have to do in order to have a happy, organized home. The only thing that has worked for me is to constantly renew my mind in the Word. I cannot just read the Bible in the morning and have a sweet spirit all day!!! That Bible has to be around for me to catch a verse here or there- or just to see it and be reminded about how I need to respond. THE hardest job I have ever had! (responding sweetly in any circumstance and amid the many little discipline issues that come up).

    Sorry I wrote a book here- but this is where I live- in complete thanks and happiness at the job God has given me (mother, wife, homeschool mom), yet struggling with my flesh daily.

    Thanks for the encouragement! It sounds to me like God is using you in a big way to love and disciple your sweet children.

  4. I think we all get snappy and outta sorts sometimes. I know I do!

    I know it sounds weird, but normally for me it means that I need to take some time for myself. Going out with girlfriends or just by myself recharges me, let's me just be Brandy and woman for a few hours, and gets me ready to get back to my children and our everyday life.

    Even the very best babies can take it outta you. Makes you feel tired and grumpy, and it just takes a while to get used to all changes no matter how good they are. It will get better and you will be back to yourself in no time!

  5. You're probably snappy because you're tired and over emotional. Think about it, you've brought home a brand new beautiful baby, and you are busy trying to adjust and figure out how he fits into your existing life, while your existing life hasn't stopped.

    I'm super impressed wtih how well you've done with all of this. So put the boys down for naps, or room time, let Hannah read a book for an hour or so, and take a nice calming bubble bath (if your doctor will let you yet).

  6. I love your goals. I know I get snappy and feel overwhelmed when I'm tired, and I can't imagine that you're getting much sleep with a three-week-old. You have a beautiful family, and I hope things get easier for you soon!

  7. (((Hugs))) Susana! Even though you are saying that you don't have postpartum blues, your hormones still sometimes takes over your mind. We don't want it to happen, but it happens... every month for a few days for a few of us. I don't have any remedy for this except reminding myself, "This too shall pass"

  8. Susana
    You are absolutely right Nobody loves and knows your children like you do. Your home school journey has been an inspiration to me. I don't believe you need to "lighten your load" by sending your children to school. Cast your burdens on God. He says that His yoke is light. Claim that promise for yourself. You are His precious child.

    And just some other random compliments: Your blog is adorable! I love the Halloween theme. The masks on your picture are fantastic.

    You have the best hair and I really want hair like yours :)

  9. We could definitely all count our blessings a little more. Thanks for the reminder :)

  10. You are so right. No one loves your children, knows your children's strengths and weaknesses, and wants to see your children succeed more than you. But this does mean we as mamas carry a heavy burden sometimes. Thank the Lord that we can trust in Him, ask Him for wisdom and place our burdens at the foot of the cross.

    Also, I have something to hopefully brighten your day:

  11. I think we have all gone through the snappy moments after giving birth, this too shall pass.

    You are right in the place you need to be in with your family, loving them, watching them all bond with each other.

    As for homeschooling, what you are doing with them now is all the schooling they need right now, they are learning to be brothers and sister, helpers, mommy and daddies, and the joy of love!

  12. You are on the right path - it's clear that you know what your priorities are and what is best for your family. I'm guessing you're just tired and that makes us snappy. It's perfectly natural and you'll get through it. It certainly doesn't mean that you should be giving up what matters to you - being with your family and homeschooling. I think you're doing great - and I even have an award for you on my blog today. :)

  13. I am sorry to hear you're having a rough week. It doesn't have to be defined as postpartum or baby blues to be a new mom who is stressed or snappish! The first weeks are rough, months, too, heck, I always tell new moms (even if they have older kids) to remember that the first year of your child's life can sometimes be the roughest. Don't forget to trust in yourself and give yourself some YOU time when you can. You have a beautiful family, you should be very proud!

  14. Very well written. Oh dear don't we all have those kind of weeks! I hope next week is better. I think your one of the better moms i've ever "met" and I haven't even "met" you .. you are devoted and loving to your kids and that is WELL DISPLAYED through your blog! Your family is so beatiful!

  15. I had my third baby just a few days before you had Jesse and I think I can relate a bit. I have, thankfully, not had PPD like I did with my 2nd or even much baby blues but I still find myself being very snappy with my 2 older kids and sometimes my husband. Thankfully my husband is understanding and lets it roll off his shoulders but I still feel bad when I get that way. And the kids don't understand. All they know is that all the sudden mommy is yelling and getting easily frustrated.
    It is all about the sleep. Added up I am only averaging about 5 hours of sleep, and that interrupted a few times, and it is just leaving me tired and snappy.
    I know things will get better and I love my new little guy. I too am trying to keep things in proper perspective. I am also trying to remind myself to take a deep breath and keep my mouth shut when all I want to do is explode. Does not always work but I am trying. :-)

  16. By all means simplify!!! It is the best approach to life - no need to do everything ... just focus on the most important (which you have). I went through the same with my #3 ... and is was a time that "came to pass" ... eventually! Keep the faith and keep it simple!

  17. You have such a beautiful family! It's ok to feel overwhelmed, your body has been through a lot in the last several months. Plus the hormones are still getting worked out.

    Great post!

  18. I just had a baby 5 months ago and I remember at the beginning I also felt like that.. i appreciated and loved my kids more than anything else but it is a bit overwhelming(and i've only got two ...) so i can imagine how you are feeling. Don't worry.. you will find strength to get through it.. i'm also very snappy with my husband and i feel so bad about it... but then again he at times is also snappy with me.. i really think it has to do with the lack of sleep that we both are getting right now... but your body will get used to it and everything will be fine :) :)